The EXACT moment you find out you are going to be a dad
You can ask every first time, soon to be father about the moment they realized they were going to be a dad and they can share with you details about that specific moment, where they were, what their initial reaction was and the series of events and conversations that took place shortly, if not immediately after. My wife and I were actively trying to have a child so it wasn’t a complete shock to me but I will always remember it as the moment my life changed forever!
My wife, I assume like most women, have a very keen sense of their body, especially when it comes to their monthly period. Birth control for women may have changed this to some degree but for women who have a monthly regular menstrual cycle they know when something is different. I remember my wife telling me a day or two after she usually started her period that something was different and she thought she was pregnant. Internally I freaked out a little bit even though this was something that we were trying to do.
My wife took a pregnancy test that we had already purchased and I remember waiting for what seemed like hours for her to come out of the bathroom. When she did finally come out she showed me the test and said that to her it showed two lines, meaning that she was pregnant. I wasn’t so sure. If it was there it was as faint as it can get without it being not there. Truth be told I am not sure if I didn’t see it or if I was trying to hold onto any last bit of my life as it had been up to this point.
Pregnancy Test Results In Order
Inconclusive test? Or just male stubbornness? Either way we agreed to go to Walgreens to pick up another pregnancy test. This one had both the regular and a digital test. Who knew pregnancy tests had gone digital?
We made it back home and into the bathroom she went. This time it seemed to not take as long for her to come back out. She had taken the regular test again and it showed a slightly more conclusive result. What the hell we might as well take the digital test right?? Instead of showing you one or two lines it actually says “Yes” or “No”. Pretty easy to interrupt. Takes the guess work out of it. Or so we thought.
At this point I was conditioning myself for a “Yes” result. In fact, I was even hoping for it. In just a matter of hours I had gone from anxiety ridden that we were going to have a baby to actively hoping that it was true! So when she came out of the bathroom with a confused look on her face it took and told me that the digital test came back as negative, I can honestly say I was disappointed.
So up to this point we had taken 3 tests. The first was, well lets just call it hard to read. The second was still pretty faint but even I thought it was positive and the third test actually read “No” not pregnant. We were pretty confused at this point and decided to wait a few days and then take another test. A few days passed and when my wife couldn’t stand it any longer she took another test. This time there were no questions about it. It was a positive test! My wife then scheduled an appointment with her regular physician and they confirmed it! We were going to be parents!
Somewhere during the course of these events I remember my anxiety getting to the point to where I needed to take a shower to help me to relax. It was during this long, hot shower that I knew that some nine months later my wife and I were going to be responsible for raising a child! This is an overwhelming thought when you first realize it. Your mind fills with countless questions that you do not have answers for, thoughts that will keep you awake at night and fears that you are going to have to overcome. Luckily, there are numerous sources, both online and in your community, for researching what steps a couple should make when they first find out they are going to have a baby. These resources have been invaluable in helping me understand what I needed to do to support my wife during her pregnancy.
Here are just a few of the online resources that I have used in educating myself on pregnancy.
Once it all sunk in the next question we had to answer was how do we tell our family and friends? How long do we wait to tell them? Should we wait at all? That my friends are topics I will cover in another post.
“Dads are most ordinary men turned by love into heroes, adventurers, story-tellers, and singer of songs.” – Pam Brown